Goals

It has been a very long time.  A lot has changed but much has stayed the same.  The past year was the most difficult of my life and now I am happy to say I'm looking at much of that difficulty in the rear view mirror.  This calender year, now that employment, eating lifestyle and other things have leveled out for the moment, I am focusing on setting small goals for myself and hopefully accomplishing them.  It is great to set personal goals but without sharing them, it is easy to forget or lose focus and not hold yourself accountable for accomplishing your goal.  I'm not really sure that blogging is really for me although I love reading a variety and do so on a daily basis.  However, I think it might help me in keeping on track with my goals to post them for the world to see.  Or at least someone in the world has the possibility of seeing.  I think that might help me stay accountable.  I struggle with getting overwhelmed at all the things I want or need to do so I think posting an attainable goal each week will help me get things done without giving up.

Last week, I did give myself a goal and that was to exercise a few times during the week.  I had hoped to do something every day but I am happy to say that I did engage in some form of exercise 4 times this week.  To me, I have accomplished that goal for last week and hope to be able to do so next week as well.  I am currently in endurance training to it is really important for me to keep up with moving my body as much as possible to avoid injury, pain and suffering.

This week's goal, along with exercise, is to go through my closet and dressers and pack away all the clothes that don't fit or I don't wear anymore.  I recently lost a little weight and a lot of my work clothes are just too big.  They stay on but look frumpy and unprofessional.  I also am at that age where I have a lot of clothes that I've had for a LONG time...like high school long time.  So a lot of it just doesn't fit properly or is just worn out.  I plan on donating everything that is still in usable condition.  Once that is complete I will have to create a goal of something that believe it or not gives me anxiety and I'd pretty much rather do anything else. Go clothes shopping.  I know it sounds totally ridiculous for a women in her late 20's to get anxiety from the idea of shopping for clothes but I really do.

This pretty much sums it up.

1) Fit: I am a petite girl. Yes, they make small sizes but I am not skinny.  I am super short and do not have the dimensions to fit into the same top/pants/skirt/whatever as the 5'9' 100lb model, they were designed for.  This makes finding nice, age appropriate, affordable clothing difficult.  Generally I am too small to fit into women's sizes and most of the juniors stuff is too "young" or trendy for what I am looking for.  Not that I'm not into that sort of thing but when you are looking for professional work clothes, it makes it difficult.  Also, many clothes just don't fit right; too big here, too small there.  Very frustrating.

2 Cost: I hate spending money.  Especially on clothes.  It just pains me to spend more than $10 on one item. Sometimes this is totally possible.  However when you only shop for clothes the 2 or 3 times a year your husband drags you out to do so, its difficult to find good deals regularly.  Also, I do understand thinking I can find well made clothing for under $10 is ridiculous.  But that doesn't mean I have to like it.  And when you have the added difficulty of needing to shop at specialty petite stores or order special sizes online and/or get clothes tailored so they'll actually fit, it makes the spending money part even worse.

3. Intimidation:  I have always been a fitting room disaster.  Crying in a fitting room is very normal for me.  I have never liked my body and never liked how clothes look on me so finding stuff I'm happy with is really difficult. And it really sucks to be that short, not skinny girl, shopping alongside women for whom these clothes will actually fit and look good on.

Seriously.

But this is a goal to deal with at another time.  Right now, I can manage on the clothes I have that do fit, but I know I need to suck it up and get some new pieces.  So I'll start with parting with the old stuff.  Maybe having no choice but to buy new things once the old things are gone will help.

Recap
Ongoing goal: exercise at least 4 times/week
This week specific goal: go through clothes, pack up donation bag and actually donate it. (I'm famous for "shopping" out of my own "Good Will" bag that I've stashed somewhere in the closet "just in case I need the clothes again.")

Thanks for reading.