Invaders!

I knew moving to a warm climate would be an adjustment. I assumed however, outside of Florida's super hot summers and missing New England's four seasons, it would be a welcomed change. Plentiful sunshine, warm air, palm trees, never having to drive in snow or contend with sub-zero temperatures all sounded great. However, one of the warnings I received before moving to my Floridian "paradise" was about the bugs.

Considering I'd lived in a 200 year old house in rural Connecticut for most of my life, I was used to seeing bugs - even inside. Every spring we'd have the invasion of the flying ants between the floor boards of our living room. Sugar ants in the kitchen were also a normal occurance. They were annoying but easily taken care of with a few applications of Borax. Even in the fall when the survivors of the first freeze would try to move inside for winter, I could handle it. I expected a similar experience and relationship with my insect friends in Florida. I was wrong. Beyond the giant bugs that the animal programs cast had on display at the front entrance of Disney's Animal Kingdom, I don't think I'd ever seen a real live cockroach. A little back story on my relationship with roaches. I HATE them. I don't even refer to them as cockroaches. They are so awful in my opinion that I only refer to them as "F-ing Roaches" (not the actual obscenity mind you...exactly as that is written). The way the arachnophobic population feels about spiders, I feel about roaches. I'm not necessarily afraid of them, I just despise their existence. And no, Wall-E's cute little roach friend in the movie, did not change my opinion of the real deal...sorry.

One morning, I stumbled out of bed at 6am and made my way to the kitchen to turn on my coffee pot. This is now part of my morning ritual and being that I am rarely actually awake at this point, its usually done in the dark. After waking up a bit more, I went back to the kitchen with the intention of pouring the wonderful, hot cup of coffee to enjoy before I started my day. I switched on the kitchen light and squinted as my eyes adjusted. Probably due to the harsh light created by those fluorescent bulbs, I looked down toward the floor. Suddenly my eyes were fully adjusted and I was wide awake...and on the edge of what felt like a heart attack. There he was, probably blinded as I had been, his antenna darting around the floor. The floor that I had just walked across BAREFOOT IN THE DARK!! His large dark brown body contrasting with the tan floor tile just made his existence more prominent. Considering it was 6am and I hadn't had the pleasure of enjoying my caffeine-filled morning beverage yet, my reaction time was not at its peak, to say the least. I stared at the intruder for a few moments in disbelief. The bug, that "f-ing roach" could not actually be in my house! My half asleep mind swirled with thoughts, 'I don't leave food out! My house isn't dirty! Only people who don't take care of their homes have roaches!' I was at a loss. However, upon realization that he was in fact there, on my kitchen floor, I tried to think of what to do. My husband was still asleep and hates bugs even more than I do so I decided to spare him of this experience. Of course as everyone knows, roaches tend to scatter when the lighting suddenly changes from dark to bright. So before I could actually come up with a plan of attack (yes, attack!), he took off under the stove, not to be seen again. I felt relief for a moment. He was gone. The fact that my insect invader had disappeared out of my sight didn't really give me solace for long however. Where did he go and would he be back?

In an attempt to put aside the apprehension of the possibility of the invader going home and telling his roach-y friends that he'd found them a new home, we called for pest control. Days went by and there was no sign of our insect intruder...until this week. It seems that despite my effort to prevent another invasion, (including vacuuming nearly everyday, never leaving food out or dishes in the sink etc.) the intruders seem to have deemed my little apartment a good place to hole up for winter. I saw a small one in the kitchen, then a large one in the kitchen, then a HUGE one in the bathroom. The fact that they were all dead or dying honestly didn't make me feel any better about the situation. I'd had it. I was on edge every time I'd wake up in the morning or re-enter my house after being gone for the day. I'd think about those stupid bugs while at work, on my way home, when trying to sleep. It was when I saw one crawling up my shower drain WHILE I WAS SHOWERING that I thought enough was enough. I stocked up on roach baits and spread them all over my house.

Enjoy you're poison roaches!! Eat up and bring it home. Happy Thanksgiving to you!

Oh and pest control is coming again today. In the broken English words of the front desk agent with who put in the pest control request. "Seen little roaches and big ones. SPRAY GOOD!"

Thanks for reading.