Blog Challenge Day 3: Gossip Girl

Disclaimer: This has nothing to do with the TV show of the same title...sorry to disappoint.

As this blog challenge is part of my recent endeavor to stop coasting through life, I've decided to pin point some things about myself that I need to work on. Something I have become increasingly guilty of over the last few years is gossip.

"A fool’s mouth is his undoing, and his lips are a snare to his soul. The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man’s inmost parts." Proverbs 18 7-8

As a Christian, I do my best to follow the biblical teachings of Christ and gossip is something that the Bible is clear on. There is no good that comes from it. One of my issues or the way that I justify my actions is that I honestly don't gossip with malicious intent. I have always been a very curious (although sometimes nosey) person. I learned to read lips in elementary school because of the amount of eavesdropping I used to do. So usually when I end up gossiping, its because I've gotten a tid bid of information about a person or I want to know about something that's happened in another persons life. This is why social networking is a double edged sword for me. It gives me information about the my friends, family and sometimes strangers (ehem Biggest Loser Contestants...shhhh) without me really having to put forth any real effort or genuine concern. However it gives me multitudes of things to gossip about as well. I can't tell you how many times I've said, "Did you see what so and so posted on facebook today?!" And then before I know it, I've become the (information relayed from facebook) gossip queen.

Intention: Good

Action: Bad

When I started to college, I was always commended for rarely talking about anyone behind their back and even going as far as stopping gossipy conversations. But joining a sorority, although a greatly rewarding experience made it very easy to get into bad habits in terms of what I said or repeated about others . This has carried over into my work enviroment. As anyone who works in any kind of entertainment field knows, gossip is rampant. I've started catching myself saying things like, "I'm not trying to be mean, but..." um hello, if you have to preface a sentence with that disclaimer, you have a problem.

Intention: On the way to Bad

Action: Bad

So all this to say that I recognize the problem and that I'm going to do something about it. No more will I justify my actions with excuses. So please, if you hear me start to gossip, help me in my endeavor to better myself and call me out on it. And if you feel that you have a gossiping problem, no matter how bad it may be, try to work on it. Something I'm learning is that you are never too far gone and that it is never too late to try and better yourself.

Thanks for reading.

BC3-8/1

Blog Challenge Day 2: Home is where the...

Google's street view of my house (well my mom's house I guess I should say)

Wait. At this point in my life, I feel like the expression should read "home is where?"

I went and did it again. I moved across the country and set up shop in a new place. Now as I have before, I feel the tug between here and the "home" where I grew up. The last time this happened, I was 18, a recent high school graduate and ready to take on the adventure of college. Instead of "adventuring" somewhere within driving distance, I figured I'd go as far as I possibly could from my home. (OK, this wasn't my intention however my "dream college" happened to be just outside of Los Angeles, California.) My freshman year was fun and exciting. I met a lot of people from all over the country. I made some friends and was able to travel most of the west coast being lucky enough to make my way from San Fransisco all the way to Ensenada, Mexico. Although I was enjoying my adventures "on my own," I missed home dreadfully. I had gone and fallen in love the summer after my senior year and being so far away from him was so difficult (Luckily I've since married him so we should never be that far apart ever again!) I missed my family, high school (life-long) friends and the east coast. The west coast is fun and exciting but with all its flair, it loses its homey-ness. This is the way I felt anyway. I loved being there but never felt at home.

I ended up having to move home and transfer to a more local college and although it was nice to be home, I really did miss what I had left in California. I had come to terms and gotten used to the idea of living at home again when I had to travel back to L.A. right before school was set to start because 1) I had bought a round trip ticket the previous spring and 2) I had to pack up the stuff I had left in a storage unit to ship home. When I got there, all my friends were moving into their dorms and getting ready to begin classes. I so badly wanted to be there that I went to the financial aid office and pleaded with them to find a way for me to stay but unfortunately it was not possible. I never expected to feel the way I did upon returning. I had known for most of the summer that I was not returning to that school but once I was there, I felt such a desire to stay.

Over the course of the next few years, I slowly stopped missing my west coast experience. I fell out of touch with friends as everyone moved on with their lives. I had moved on as well and had created another new life for myself at the university I attended in Connecticut.

When I finally graduated, the downturn of the economy was just beginning. Suddenly there were no jobs in CT, so I my best option seemed to be to go back to Orlando, FL where I had done an "internship" during college. As much as I enjoyed being in my home state, the prospect of starting a career and another new adventure got to me again. So I convinced the boy to come with me this time and we left on our adventure. Well, since recessions don't leave much room for adventuring, things were not as we expected. After dealing with about a year of difficulty in trying to find permanent work, we thought maybe it was time to move back home. But (of course) a job opportunity presented itself here that we could not pass up. It has been a few years now and we've started to feel at home here.

Now I am stuck yet again. We are not in the position to move for another couple years but have begun talking about where we want to make our future especially if we start a family. I have gone and made friends and created some semblance of a life here but still feel so strongly tied to where I grew up. I hate being to far away but I don't know if I'd be happier moving back home.

Which brings me back to where I started...

Home is where?

Thanks for reading.

BC2-7/31

Blog Challenge Day 1: I'm Baaaaaack

Dancing fool status at my wedding

So instead of giving you a long list of excuses as to why I haven't blogged for almost 8 months, I'm just going to dive right in.

I recently had a performance review at work and was told that it seemed like I had gotten into a rut. That couldn't be more true. Not just at work but honestly in all aspects of my life. Last year was very intense for me. From going full time at work, moving, oh and um planning my wedding and getting married! So after the initial "newlywed" phase coming down from all that, I think I've gotten a little stuck. I've been just kind of coasting through life. At first this was a good thing after last year. I had more time to relax and spend quality time with my husband which has been so great. Being a newlywed is really wonderful and we love marriage so much that we really couldn't be happier right now. But in terms of the "coasting through life," relaxation has turned into laziness and complacency. Womp, womp. So after my reality check at work, the person giving my review challenged me to really step it up, so I am going to take her challenge into other areas of my life as well because God knows I need to.

First up is the blog. So I was going to do a 30 day blog challenge. As in, write a blog post everyday for 30 days. But then realized I really want to have this done before I start graduate classes in August. I want to be able to give the challenge my full attention but I want to make sure it doesn't interfere with school. So then I decided to do a 25 day challenge which would have started yesterday but of course I forgot. So, now in true Ellie fashion of never doing things the conventional way, its going to be a 24 day challenge, starting...now! I am going to do my absolute best to write and publish a post everyday until August 22nd. Yikes!

I have some ideas on post content but if anyone would like me to write about anything in particular or has any ideas on something to write about, please let me know. I'd love to actually get a following on this blog (I know it helps if I actually write posts) so I'd love to write material people will be interested in reading.

Thanks for reading.

BC1 -7/30

"Light the Lamp! Not the Rat!"

This is the third holiday season since I moved away from my family and friends in Connecticut. Because Christmastime is the single busiest time of year at Disney, as a Cast Member, they own my soul from Oct. 31st to Jan. 7th. Literally, we're not even allowed to request any days off during that time frame. Anyway, since I have very little seniority with the company, I have not been able to travel home for the holidays since moving here. I always miss my home and family during this time, but especially my sister.

I was blessed with one sibling. A younger sister born about two and half years after me. Although after joining a sorority, I've been lucky enough to have many wonderful women to call my sisters, I only have one true, flesh and blood sister. I'm sure many of you share your most treasured holiday traditions with your family as well. But being that we lived 3 hours away from our closest relatives, I usually spent the holidays with my immediate family only. We created many traditions and memories over the years but the ones I remember most fondly are those I created with my sister.

She is the only person who understands that it is an absolute requirement that we not only watch, but quote and sing every word of The Muppet Christmas Carol on Christmas eve and she knows my exact favorite part of the movie and that I fall over laughing every time.

She knows that on Christmas eve we'll try to make a fire in our fireplace which usually ends in a lot of smoke and a sad little flame while we open our 1 present.

She's knows that Jeff (who is a tree and not a person) spent every Christmas in our kitchen sitting atop the (unused!) wood stove. And she remembers the first Jeff and how he came to be in our house.

She is the only one who knows all the melody parts of which I know the harmony on the Amy Grant Home for Christmas CD that we sing along to while driving around looking for the craziest Christmas houses after church on Christmas eve.

She is the only person I've gotten trouble with during the Christmas eve service at Church. She also lets me freak out every year about her lighting my hair on fire during the candle lighting even though she's never come close.

She is really the only other person who understands my mom's love for A Christmas Story movie and will leave the marathon on, all day Christmas day.

She knows that although our dad loved How the Grinch Stole Christmas and pretended he felt the way the Grinch did about Christmas, he really loved making it magical for us and our mom.

And she is the only person who will drag her mattress across the hall into my bedroom so we can wake up together Christmas morning. <3

 And I could go on and on. My sister and I are very different people and have never been the closest of siblings but I always miss her so much during the holidays. I hope that my children create holiday traditions and memories together that they will cherish as much as I cherish the ones I have with my sister.

Here we are at Mickey's Very Merry Christmas Party in 2005

Thanks for reading.

So this one time I got married

For those readers who personally know me (aka. all of you) you know that I started dating my husband eight years ago at the tender age of 18. We did have a teenage whirlwind romance but came back down to earth as the years trudged on. We always knew that we'd get married someday. As the years went by, I built engagement and marriage up in my mind to a somewhat ridiculous level. I realized my guilt in doing this to myself after a few years and wondered if I'd feel a sense of disappointment once the engagement and impending marriage finally took place.

Engagement was more difficult than I expected but not a disappointment. No matter how many people tell you or many many silly wedding tv shows you watch, it doesn't prepare you for the stress and pressure of planning a wedding. And I had a lot of help. But I am happy to report that marriage is so far from a disappointment compared to what I had built it up to be. In fact, marriage has exceeded my expectations (which I honestly didn't think was possible). Eight years of build up is a lot. I will say, it is different than I expected but in positive ways. The level of comfort I feel with my husband is something I haven't really experienced with a person before. Also, marriage (so far) is much simpler than our dating relationship ever was. Of course I'm still very much a newlywed and only have about 3 months of marriage under my belt. But I believe marrying Duncan was truly one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life. And I'm confident that we'll run into struggles, road blocks and tough times but I really do have faith in our love and our marriage.

Thanks for reading.

(Apologies for the terrible grammar and bad writing in this post. This is what happens when one does not practice their craft...I'm working on it. But as promised I am posting a piece that I am not very happy with because the more I write, the better I'll get, right?)

Invaders!

I knew moving to a warm climate would be an adjustment. I assumed however, outside of Florida's super hot summers and missing New England's four seasons, it would be a welcomed change. Plentiful sunshine, warm air, palm trees, never having to drive in snow or contend with sub-zero temperatures all sounded great. However, one of the warnings I received before moving to my Floridian "paradise" was about the bugs.

Considering I'd lived in a 200 year old house in rural Connecticut for most of my life, I was used to seeing bugs - even inside. Every spring we'd have the invasion of the flying ants between the floor boards of our living room. Sugar ants in the kitchen were also a normal occurance. They were annoying but easily taken care of with a few applications of Borax. Even in the fall when the survivors of the first freeze would try to move inside for winter, I could handle it. I expected a similar experience and relationship with my insect friends in Florida. I was wrong. Beyond the giant bugs that the animal programs cast had on display at the front entrance of Disney's Animal Kingdom, I don't think I'd ever seen a real live cockroach. A little back story on my relationship with roaches. I HATE them. I don't even refer to them as cockroaches. They are so awful in my opinion that I only refer to them as "F-ing Roaches" (not the actual obscenity mind you...exactly as that is written). The way the arachnophobic population feels about spiders, I feel about roaches. I'm not necessarily afraid of them, I just despise their existence. And no, Wall-E's cute little roach friend in the movie, did not change my opinion of the real deal...sorry.

One morning, I stumbled out of bed at 6am and made my way to the kitchen to turn on my coffee pot. This is now part of my morning ritual and being that I am rarely actually awake at this point, its usually done in the dark. After waking up a bit more, I went back to the kitchen with the intention of pouring the wonderful, hot cup of coffee to enjoy before I started my day. I switched on the kitchen light and squinted as my eyes adjusted. Probably due to the harsh light created by those fluorescent bulbs, I looked down toward the floor. Suddenly my eyes were fully adjusted and I was wide awake...and on the edge of what felt like a heart attack. There he was, probably blinded as I had been, his antenna darting around the floor. The floor that I had just walked across BAREFOOT IN THE DARK!! His large dark brown body contrasting with the tan floor tile just made his existence more prominent. Considering it was 6am and I hadn't had the pleasure of enjoying my caffeine-filled morning beverage yet, my reaction time was not at its peak, to say the least. I stared at the intruder for a few moments in disbelief. The bug, that "f-ing roach" could not actually be in my house! My half asleep mind swirled with thoughts, 'I don't leave food out! My house isn't dirty! Only people who don't take care of their homes have roaches!' I was at a loss. However, upon realization that he was in fact there, on my kitchen floor, I tried to think of what to do. My husband was still asleep and hates bugs even more than I do so I decided to spare him of this experience. Of course as everyone knows, roaches tend to scatter when the lighting suddenly changes from dark to bright. So before I could actually come up with a plan of attack (yes, attack!), he took off under the stove, not to be seen again. I felt relief for a moment. He was gone. The fact that my insect invader had disappeared out of my sight didn't really give me solace for long however. Where did he go and would he be back?

In an attempt to put aside the apprehension of the possibility of the invader going home and telling his roach-y friends that he'd found them a new home, we called for pest control. Days went by and there was no sign of our insect intruder...until this week. It seems that despite my effort to prevent another invasion, (including vacuuming nearly everyday, never leaving food out or dishes in the sink etc.) the intruders seem to have deemed my little apartment a good place to hole up for winter. I saw a small one in the kitchen, then a large one in the kitchen, then a HUGE one in the bathroom. The fact that they were all dead or dying honestly didn't make me feel any better about the situation. I'd had it. I was on edge every time I'd wake up in the morning or re-enter my house after being gone for the day. I'd think about those stupid bugs while at work, on my way home, when trying to sleep. It was when I saw one crawling up my shower drain WHILE I WAS SHOWERING that I thought enough was enough. I stocked up on roach baits and spread them all over my house.

Enjoy you're poison roaches!! Eat up and bring it home. Happy Thanksgiving to you!

Oh and pest control is coming again today. In the broken English words of the front desk agent with who put in the pest control request. "Seen little roaches and big ones. SPRAY GOOD!"

Thanks for reading.

I am not a writer

Ok world,
(aka. Mom, Mom-in-law and my few sweet friends who will actually read this)
I was thinking about this blog and how, as much as I want to keep it current, I clearly am not making it a priority. Granted I was a little busy over the summer, you know getting a full time job, planning my wedding etc. but the time for excuses is over. I'm going to level with you. The real reason I don't update this more often is because I'm too much of a perfectionist especially when it comes to my writing. I want so badly to I be a writer but if I continue avoiding writing, I AM NOT A WRITER. What kind of writer doesn't write?...all the time?...as much as possible? Ask anyone who's published. I guarantee you that one eighty millionth (is that a number?...or a word for that matter? lol) of what they write actually gets published. Either way, I will try to put my desire for perfection after my desire to write. Besides, I'm not Julie...this blog ain't gettin' published...we all know that. (Especially with that grammar ha!) So I really have no excuse. So write I will...finished, polished, "perfect" or not.

Thanks for reading.